• Forest for the Trees
  • THE FOREST FOR THE TREES is about writing, publishing and what makes writers tick. This blog is dedicated to the self loathing that afflicts most writers. A community of like-minded malcontents gather here. I post less frequently now, but hopefully with as much vitriol. Please join in! Gluttons for punishment can scroll through the archives.

    If I’ve learned one thing about writers, it’s this: we really are all alone. Thanks for reading. Love, Betsy

I Been Through the Desert on a Horse with No Name

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I just got back from the National Bridge Championships in Reno. Rinse and repeat: I went to Reno to play in the National Championships in the newbie category. Friends, writing a book is cake compared to playing  Bridge under tournament conditions. I am so happy to be home, released from the cavernous underworld of the El Dorado hotel and casino. I had no idea that the competitive world of Bridge could be so intense or how nervous I would get when it came time to bid or play the hand. I had no idea that this entire sub-culture existed. After all, my mother exclusively played at home with her ladies. When she was the dummy, she’d get up and wash the grapes. No noshing at the ACBL National Championships. No talking or texting. It’s intimidating and the people who say it’s just a game would sooner take your tonsils out than give up  a trick. I finished in the 36th percentile. #walkofshame

What do you do for fun?

 

 

Forever’s Gonna Start Tonight

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Going to the Bridge Nationals in Reno with my mother tomorrow. I was hoping to have lost 14 pounds by now. I’ve only gained two. That’s an actual win if you feel me. Wish us luck, Rozzie baby and me. This book made a team of us.

Let’s the talk about the edge of sentimentality. How do you know when you’ve gone too far? Does Love mean never having to say you’re sorry for that metaphor?

 

They Say as a Child I Appeared a Little Bit Wild

 

tumblr_m5agp4ws751rxiaoto1_500Someone recently asked me if I felt anxious about the book coming out because it is so personal. Get to know me. I’m anxious because it might not sell. I’m anxious because the New York Times might say mean things, or worse say nothing at all. I’m anxious because if I fail it’s not only in front of my friends and family, but the publishing profession where I work. I’m anxious because I’m not in therapy and I probably should be. I’m anxious because I don’t feel like myself, meaning I feel a little hopeful and that is just not part of the package.  I’m anxious because it’s all out of my hands now with the exception of boosting Facebook pages and going up and down Fifth avenue in the sandwich boards I’ve made with the Queen of Hearts on both sides.

What makes you anxious about getting your work out there? What’s your worst fear?

Here We Are Now Entertain Us

ENTER MIDLER ABA

Today the video team from HarperCollins came to my mother’s house to shoot the Bridge Ladies. If this doesn’t go viral I don’t know what will. Spoiler alert: you will find out what days the ladies play Bridge. My mother would like Bette Midler to play her in the film.

Who should play me? And don’t say Robert Downey, Jr.

 

Build Me Up Buttercup Don’t Break my Heart

 

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My Bridge Lady, Roslyn Lerner

Guys!! It’s my first freakin’ review and it’s good!!  I’m like dancing in the streets while watching LUTHER. It doesn’t really get much better than that. Oh wait, it does. I CARBS for dinner!!

PUBLISHERS WEEKLY The Bridge Ladies Betsy Lerner. Harper Wave, $25.99 (272 pgs)

This absorbing memoir by literary agent and author Lerner (The Forest for the Trees) is about the game of bridge, but it’s also about bridging gaps—both the generational gap and the “personal gulf” that had defined Lerner’s relationship with her mother. At age 54, due to her husband’s job relocation, Lerner finds herself back in her hometown of New Haven, Conn., where her 83-year-old widowed mother still resides. Hoping to repair at least some of the rifts between them, she somewhat reluctantly re-enters her mother’s life and begins attending her Monday afternoon bridge game, first as an observer and later—after taking lessons at the Manhattan Bridge Club—as an occasional participant. Along with descriptions of her bridge lessons, Lerner shares the histories of the elegantly dressed New Haven ladies who have met weekly for 55 years, women who came of age in the 1940s and ’50s. As Lerner probes marriage, career, motherhood, postpartum depression, aging, death, assisted living, dementia, widowhood, religion, and sex, she discovers that although her mother and her bridge companions differ in some ways from her own generation (for example, they felt that marriage to a Jewish man trumped pursuing a career), they share common values of love and kinship. She also draws closer to her mother, gaining a deeper understanding of her interior life, including the rarely discussed childhood death of Lerner’s sister. This beautifully written, bittersweet story of ladies of a certain age and era will have wide appeal. (May)

Tell me about your mom.

 

Tell Me Something Good

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I want to thank you for all the suggestions. All excellent, but I think I found the new tonic, the new obsession, the new rabbit hole:  LUTHER. A new TV series to wrap myself around in. A new detective. Toodles McNulty (oh, of course, I’ll always love you. Oh, and Ruth Wilson rears her head and her sinister lips in Luther) But I also realize as I’m writing this that I used feel this way about books. Now I push myself to read. (Forgetting that I read and edit manuscripts all day.) Though I did just buy the first Ferrante that everyone is raving about. And short novel by Heinrich Boll.

What are you reading for pleasure?  Pure pleasure.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Don’t Give Yourself Away

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You’ve heard of Bridezilla? Meet me: Authorzilla. Friends, I am losing my shit. I have stopped sleeping, I play Bridge all night with strangers on my Ipad. Last night, this guy called Doug416 was my partner and when I really screwed up a hand he typed: NWP, which I think means No Worries Partner, though it could mean Go Fuck Yourself. I’m having a hard time reading people. I am a person who has a book about to come out, which means rashes are erupting on my body, my molars are begging for mercy, I can’t stay on a diet for more than six minutes and I’m exaggerating: five.

The most fucked up thing about this: I have been in publishing for 30 years. I’ve looked at love from both sides now, from up and down, and still somehow.

Cures for anxiety? Help!

All in All It’s Just Another Brick in the Wall

 

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I’m not saying I took this writer on because he was 19 or because he was a genius. It just didn’t hurt. Please check our Nikil Goyal‘s new book (yes he wrote his first book while he was in high school, slackers)  SCHOOLS ON TRIAL: How Freedom and Creativity Can Fix Our Educational Malpractice. He is a passionate and brilliant young man who has a vision for the future of schools that includes learning.

I smoked a lot of pot in high school. And wrote bad poems. What did you do?

 

To Pimp a Butterfly

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Something I write about quite a lot in The Bridge Ladies is how the women have lost touch with popular culture and technology. I’m not exactly snarky, but it’s frustrating and sometimes sad to watch them sail away on their ice floe while the world passes by. And yet here I am watching the Grammy’s and I don’t really know who half he artists are and I’m sure that as I get older the ratio will tip the Malcolm Gladwell. Fuck. I don’t want to grow old if I can’t hold on. I’m going to bed after Adele.

Who is your last best?

 

Without a Dream In My Heart Without a Love of My Own

Whatever possesses birches to undress
in the dead of winter, to stand
in the woods all solitary and come-hither,
their papery spice-colored layers wavering
in the wet, weighty breeze?
The peeling layers go on revealing
what’s underneath until it seems
there are more layers than there is tree.
A tree half-peeled is no less a tree,
any underbark revealed is nearly healed.
                                        –Jean Monahan

 

087da00I spent the weekend with my great friend from graduate school, Jean Monahan. She’s a poet and had just started writing after a long hiatus. She gave me her poems and it was wonderful to give her notes. I was drawn to her all those years ago because of her writing. Unlike everyone who was weaving pop culture into their stanzas, she danced around the edges of Marianne Moore and Elizabeth Bishop; her poems subtle, arresting, the emotion catching you by surprise.

I always tell people that one of the most important things you should get from a writing program or conference is finding your ideal reader. Someone you can always share work with and get an honest response from. I always tell people not to trust best friends, mothers or people you sleep with. They have a vested interest. Writers need writers.

Who is your ideal reader?