• Forest for the Trees
  • THE FOREST FOR THE TREES is about writing, publishing and what makes writers tick. This blog is dedicated to the self loathing that afflicts most writers. A community of like-minded malcontents gather here. I post less frequently now, but hopefully with as much vitriol. Please join in! Gluttons for punishment can scroll through the archives.

    If I’ve learned one thing about writers, it’s this: we really are all alone. Thanks for reading. Love, Betsy

How Do You SOlve a Problem Like Maria

I’ve spent thirty years as an editor and now agent talking writers off the ledge. That’s what we do. And it’s never more intense than in the two months before publication when anything and nothing can happen. When all your hopes and dreams could fill a dirigible floating over the city. Your fears and anxieties florid and deranged.

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HOw do I talk people off the ledge. First, I remind them their book is awesome, how much work it took, their dedication, their craft, how worthwhile it is even before a single copy is sold. Then I tell them stories the way you tell children stories to keep the bogey man away or stories to make them feel hopeful, about little trains that could. Or little books that grew up into mighty oaks. I get them thinking about their next book, about their inner life as a writer, about the long distance race. If all this fails, I suggest, they go shopping, to the movies, mani/pedi, hit the gym, start tutoring kids. If you’re in therapy: stay. If you’re not: start.

When I try to talk myself off the ledge, I realize something very scary. I am the ledge. Any advice?

 

 

Love the One You’re With

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It’s not in my DNA to say I’m a writer. When someone asks me what I do, I say I’m a literary agent. SOmetimes I say I’m an accountant if I don’t want a conversation to ensue that invariably ends up with the other person telling me about a manuscript they are writing or wish they were writing. Or that their cousin is writing.

When people ask what you do, what do you tell them.

 

 

It’s Hard to Get By Just Upon a Smile

 

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Tina! Stop writing my book!

I decided to jerk off, er, I mean read my Amazon reviews. This one really popped: “The story of the bridge ladies probably could have been a better book, if someone else had written it.”  I nominate James Joyce, James Patterson, and King James. Don’t mean to be facetious. Don Delillo, Jonathan Franzen, Susan Sontag. I actually think the book would have been a lot better if Tina Fey wrote it. Or Mindy Kalig, or Chelsea Hander. Are you there Bridge Mix, it’s me Betsy. 

A long time ago, I read an interview with SPike Lee. HE was asked how felt abut getting bad reviews and he answered something like, That’s the price for getting in the game. I’ve shared his words with many clients and I live by them.

But back to speculating: who do you think should write your book?

You Are My Love and My Life

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Let us know praise famous men. Please lift your glass to our good friend Vivian Swift on the publication of her third book, Gardens of Awe and Folly.  Full disclosure: I’ve been pissed at Vivian ever since she said she was a size two and her secret to dieting was learning how to be hungry. That aside, this book is gorgeous and soul-stirring and magical. Congratulations, Vivian!

 

Life Used to Be So Hard

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Today, I got on the subway carrying my red Knopf tote bag. A young woman who looked like Jean Seberg got on carrying a New Yorker tote. She was looking at her phone; I was looking at mine. I wanted her to notice me. I wanted to be her. I wondered if she worked in a cubicle at the New Yorker, reading short stories until she died of boredom. Or maybe she waded through millions of poems and went home at night and played flute. Of course, she smokes either Gauloise or American Spirits. She looked sad. Her girlfriend keeps picking fights for no reason and the paint on the radiator is curling like bark.

What short story did you walk into today?

 

Don’t Tell Me Not To Live

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Last night, I had the great honor of escorting my friend and client George Hodgman to the National Book Critics Circle Awards; his book Bettyville was a finalist. Ittook place at New School’s beautiful auditorium that looks like the inside of a deco egg. It was a star-studded event. To the left of us, Helen McDonald sans hawk. Directly in front of me Paul Beatty who I’ve loved since his first book of poems. Wendell Berry seemed annoyed to be receiving a lifetime achievement award. Everywhere in attendance proud editors, agents and family members. Margo Jefferson’s memoir Negroland won in George’s category, autobiography. No complaint there, but still I have to admit that in the moment before the winner’s name is announced, I found myself hoping with the fervor of a small child making a birthday wish. We consoled and celebrated over a long and delicious dinner with friends where much publishing gossip was exchanged. A meal in itself. When I think about reading the first pages George shared with me and sitting with him last night, and all the work in between that went into Bettyville, I feel so fortunate. Publishing doesn’t always fuck you over,

I Been Through the Desert on a Horse with No Name

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I just got back from the National Bridge Championships in Reno. Rinse and repeat: I went to Reno to play in the National Championships in the newbie category. Friends, writing a book is cake compared to playing  Bridge under tournament conditions. I am so happy to be home, released from the cavernous underworld of the El Dorado hotel and casino. I had no idea that the competitive world of Bridge could be so intense or how nervous I would get when it came time to bid or play the hand. I had no idea that this entire sub-culture existed. After all, my mother exclusively played at home with her ladies. When she was the dummy, she’d get up and wash the grapes. No noshing at the ACBL National Championships. No talking or texting. It’s intimidating and the people who say it’s just a game would sooner take your tonsils out than give up  a trick. I finished in the 36th percentile. #walkofshame

What do you do for fun?

 

 

Forever’s Gonna Start Tonight

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Going to the Bridge Nationals in Reno with my mother tomorrow. I was hoping to have lost 14 pounds by now. I’ve only gained two. That’s an actual win if you feel me. Wish us luck, Rozzie baby and me. This book made a team of us.

Let’s the talk about the edge of sentimentality. How do you know when you’ve gone too far? Does Love mean never having to say you’re sorry for that metaphor?

 

They Say as a Child I Appeared a Little Bit Wild

 

tumblr_m5agp4ws751rxiaoto1_500Someone recently asked me if I felt anxious about the book coming out because it is so personal. Get to know me. I’m anxious because it might not sell. I’m anxious because the New York Times might say mean things, or worse say nothing at all. I’m anxious because if I fail it’s not only in front of my friends and family, but the publishing profession where I work. I’m anxious because I’m not in therapy and I probably should be. I’m anxious because I don’t feel like myself, meaning I feel a little hopeful and that is just not part of the package.  I’m anxious because it’s all out of my hands now with the exception of boosting Facebook pages and going up and down Fifth avenue in the sandwich boards I’ve made with the Queen of Hearts on both sides.

What makes you anxious about getting your work out there? What’s your worst fear?

Here We Are Now Entertain Us

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Today the video team from HarperCollins came to my mother’s house to shoot the Bridge Ladies. If this doesn’t go viral I don’t know what will. Spoiler alert: you will find out what days the ladies play Bridge. My mother would like Bette Midler to play her in the film.

Who should play me? And don’t say Robert Downey, Jr.