• Bridge Ladies

    Bridge Ladies When I set out to learn about my mother's bridge club, the Jewish octogenarians behind the matching outfits and accessories, I never expected to fall in love with them. This is the story of the ladies, their game, their gen, and the ragged path that led me back to my mother.
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People Stop And Stare They Don’t Bother Me

When I was in junior high school everyone loved this history teacher, let’s call him Mr. Mustache. He was hip, he was funny, he perched himself on the edge of a desk and spoke “frankly.” He was the most popular teacher in the school. I hated him, thought he was a phony, his lines predictable and folksy. Then everyone fell in love with the movie, E.T. Not for me. So fucking saccharine.
You can disagree with me. My whole life, I’ve had this perverse streak of hating everything everyone loves. With the exception of Broadway, the Thanksgiving Parade, and a nice bowl of primo weed.

What do you hate that everyone loves?

19 Responses

  1. Porn. I don’t get it. Yes, really.

  2. everything.

  3. Christmas, movies, and Jodi Picoult

  4. Where do I start? Well, how about here: “Ol Black Water” by the Doobie Brothers, circus clowns and pie à la mode.

  5. First of all, I think you have pretty good taste in music and literature, judging by your comments and posts.
    I hate burgers, steak and hot dogs. I feel like I’m a fraud as an American.

  6. Phones. Black Fridays. Christmas songs sung by new artists. Give me Bing, Frank, and Elvis any day. Snow skiing vacations. I got more but I’ll quit.

  7. RAP & It’s Bastard Children. Sean X

  8. The Thanksgiving parade.

  9. i hate that useless Thanksgiving parade, since you asked. and also the smell of pot. I e never bothered smoking it. in Broadway, however, we agree.
    And while I’m here, the grateful dead. Lastly, Star Wars.

  10. Knee-jerk patriotism, especially by those who have never been downrange.

  11. Network TV shows.

  12. Smart phones and the apps which want to manage/monitor every facet of human existence. I’ll keep my flip phone, thank you, and avoid (as much as possible) being a pawn of meta-data and Big Brother.

  13. “What do you hate that everyone loves?”

    I don’t know. I don’t know everyone. I do know that I don’t hate much, and that what I do hate, other people hate, too. Not all of them, but I can’t do a damn thing for the idiots.

  14. Heroes that want you to play victim (that fucking kills me.) Saturday Night Live (still don’t get what’s so funny.) People who think they are smart because someone told them they are and now they want you to be part of their smart discussion, putting you on the spot while not being aware that in fact they might be mildly retarded and really need you to prop up their fragile sense of existing more than anything (extremely painful.) Sex and Love (totally overrated. Give me a good forehead licking by my cat.) Writing.

  15. Summer.
    Windows 10. I miss XP.
    Most people, esp. passive aggressive smiley ones.

  16. Jim Carrey and Adam Sandler movies. Too silly for me.
    The religious right. Not every Christian agrees with them.
    People who say, “You don’t really feel that way.” How do they know how I really feel?

  17. Blockbuster movies. Titanic was worst movie I ever saw. Star Wars series and Harry Potters were the worst ones I never saw. Never saw Godfather movies, or Rocky movies either. Raiders of the Lost Arc – movie or series, I don’t even know.

    I also hate any video content on the internet that I could consume in written form. Nothing gets me more pissed than seeing a juicy title of an article and clicking to find out that it is in video form only. I read much faster than some awful reporter can spit the story out. Meanwhile I am already on to the next thing…

  18. I’ve always carried a healthy distaste for the things “everyone loves” or “everyone is doing.” At a young age, my mother gave me the age-old scenario, “If your friends jumped off a bridge, would you follow them?” The idea and its inherent mindlessness, frankly, scared me. Several years after that, I watched the Dodos jump over a cliff all at once in the animated flick ‘Ice Age’ and immediately, inherently shook my head and said, “Uh uh, no way, that’s not for me.” And so began my lifelong pursuit to not be trendy. But your references to E.T., Broadway, and primo weed only make me want to meet you more. What are your feelings on high fives? I kinda wanna give you one.

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