Betsy Lerner

Ashes, Ashes

Posted on July 20, 2009 by betsylerner

I know I wrote about Frank McCourt in The Forest for the Trees, using him, among others, as an example of a late bloomer. My books are still packed away, or I’d dig it up. The salient point: McCourt was published for the first time at the age of 66. You see some of these geezers at writing conferences and it’s hard not to think: game over. McCourt changed all that. But there was something in his NYT obit that touched me even more.

“On the side, Mr. McCourt made fitful stabs at writing. He contributed articles on Ireland to The Village Voice, kept notebooks. But at the Lion’s Head in Greenwich Village, where he became friends with Pete Hamill and Jimmy Breslin, he felt like an interloper, he said. They were writers. He was just a teacher.”

And then, “An early attempt, when he was studying at NYU, had fizzled out, but three decades later, he said, he had worked through his awkward self-conscious James Joyce phase and had gotten beyond the crippling anger that darkened his memories.”

Finally, the obit explains how, in what he thought was a note to himself, he found his voice, “That was it. It carried me through to the end of the book.”

It’s all there. The pervasive imposter/interloper complex most writers feel (many well into years of having been published). What is that about? Does a musician feel like a fraud if he hasn’t recorded? An artist if he hasn’t had a retrospective a MOMA? What is it about writing?There’s a great Mona Van Duyn poem (again packed away) about taking a vision test for a driver’s license, and the mortification she feels when asked her occupation.

Then there are the fits and starts and thirty year “hiatus” from writing. Oh, yeah, and the crippling anger. I can’t relate.

And last, finding your voice. Like what? An old friend? Like the true self? Like a gift you never expected and probably don’t deserve.

Raise a pint to Mr. McCourt. Four million hardcover copies, Pulitzer Prize, National Book Critics Circle. Well, not too shabby for an old geezer.

Filed under: Authors, Writing | 6 Comments »

FAQ: Don’t You Want Me Baby

Posted on July 17, 2009 by betsylerner

Anonymous writes:

What’s the protocol when an agent makes an offer of representation and there are other agents interested in the book, too (i.e., agents who have requested fulls)? Is it kosher to ask the offering agent–after expressing genuine delight and great interest–for a short period of time to notify other interested agents before giving an answer? How do agents really feel about this–are they accepting of the competition, or resentful of being made to wait?

Dear Hot One:

It would be good to know if you told the agents in your query letter that you were sending your work out on multiple submission. Then they would certainly understand. But even if you didn’t, you’re fine. That’s the beauty of being in demand. It isn’t every day you get to be in the driver’s seat, just remember to take it slow and be courteous.

You ask if the first agent will feel resentful. The agent may be miffed. He did read the novel and get back to you first. He has gushed to you and wants to represent you. No one likes to find out he’s not the only guy in a tux with a corsage standing outside your door. But it’s not a race. Being first says a great deal about an agent’s enthusiasm, but how the agent behaves upon hearing that you have it out with others will tell you even more about that person. If he or she is gracious, that’s a good sign. He wants what’s best for you. If he puts enormous pressure on you, well, I wouldn’t like that. But this happens all the time, and my philosophy is: clients should have their choice (if they are fortunate enough to have a choice), and they will likely pick the agent who is right for them.

Anyway, here’s what I would do:

Tell the interested agent that it’s out with others and you want to talk with all interested parties before making a decision. There are some agents who will only consider work if they have it exclusively. I think this is bullshit. But obviously if that is the case they will tell you and you will have to decide. Most of us understand that most writers are approaching multiple agents.
Tell the other agents that you have interest and could they get back to you in a week or two.
Have conversations with all interested parties, better yet come to NYC and meet them if at all possible.
Don’t drag it out – agents don’t mind waiting, but nobody likes to be jerked around.

Anyway, Anonymous, don’t forget to write and tell us how you make out. Way cool.

Filed under: Agent, FAQ | 3 Comments »

Whenever I Feel Afraid

Posted on July 16, 2009 by betsylerner

I’m relieved not to face another cafeteria meal, not the food so much as the reminder of myself in seventh grade when the planetary system of our junior high lunch room shifted in ways often imperceptible and sometimes like a meteor storm leaving so much debris in its wake. All that self-consciousness then, and even now, at this advanced age. Excuse me, is that seat taken? Hi, is anyone sitting there?

Tin House is an excellent conference with worshops, lectures, and readings in a stunning outdoor amphitheater overlooking a pond where ducks and geese squabble. Cocktails every night on a beautiful quad, and from what I hear there’s even a decent amount of hooking up. In the faculty dorm, drinking, poker, and other manly arts.

I spoke with a few writers around the edges of the conference who reminded me of myself when I first attended workshops as a student: a little awkward, nervous, excited. They had all taken that first brave step, announced in some important way to themselves that they were writers. They were here.

One young man told me he was working on a memoir. “What happened to you?” I asked. He laughed and coughed on the drag of the cigarette he was taking. “What happened to me?” he repeated. “Yeah,” I persisted, “what happened that you have to write about.” The young man snubbed out his cigarette, “Okay,” he said, “If you put it that way, I’ll tell you.”

And then he told me one of the saddest stories I have ever heard.

Filed under: Writers, Writing | 7 Comments »

Drive-by Shootings

Posted on July 15, 2009 by betsylerner

For each day that I’ve been here, at the Tin House Writers Conference, I meet with nine conference attendees for a ten minute agent consult from 4:30-6:00. I never did speed dating (I was more interested in long drawn-out painful dating), but it must be a little like that, you’ve got this tiny window to make an impression. Boom!

Some writers are like the little bird in the children’s book, “Are You My Mother?” In the story, a mother bird goes off to look for food. The infant bird awakens and falls out of the nest. He wanders the countryside asking all manner of animal, cow, horse, dog, etc., “are you my mother.” Of course the book has a happy ending, but it always broke my heart, maternal longing being what it is.

Others come somewhat shattered from a rough workshop session. Others come with questions written down on index cards. Index cards! Some of the writers are all over the place and you feel the ten minutes ticking down as they race to get everything in. With some, I dig a little, curious about their project, their day jobs and lives. With others, I begin to wonder why I was born.

Last night, I broke through a shyness wall and hung out with the big game, the published authors. Drank.

Filed under: Authors, Writers | 6 Comments »

Dear

Posted on July 14, 2009 by betsylerner

Half-way through the conference. Just thought I’d mention that the bathrooms are co-ed. Gave a rousing talk this morning about query letters. Spent a couple of hours at Powell’s bookstore in downtown Portland and never got out of the poetry section. Met Walter Kirn. Cool dude. Breakfast with Dorothy Allison. Coolest dude. What else? Met a new client who lives in Portland — very smart, lovely man. And played a mean game of croquet with Tin House editor Rob Spillman, his son Miles, agent Julie Behr, and the poet Kevin Young. I held my own.

Filed under: Writing | 2 Comments »

Don’t Knock a Teapot**

Posted on July 11, 2009 by betsylerner

I didn’t have a particularly literary day, unless you count going to Marshall’s, Home Depot and Trader Joe’s cause for a sonnet. I’m leaving tomorrow for the Tin House Conference. In preparation, I bought a new shirt and two bras at Marshall’s. I hope this will make me appear more perky than I feel.

I may not be able to post again until I’m back on Thursday, unless my plane crashes. In this case, I have left eleven poems, three screenplays, a third of a manuscript about my eighty-three year old pottery teacher, clay and loneliness, and thirty or more scorching diaries. I also have every letter I’ve ever received, including nearly fifty from someone in high school I never loved well enough, which I planned to use as the basis for a young adult novel. I ‘m sure I would love posthumous fame were I around to enjoy it.

**Don’t talk foolishness (from Hooray for Yiddish)

Filed under: The End of the World as We Know It | 3 Comments »

“I’m only interested in stories that are about the crushing of a human heart.”*

Posted on July 10, 2009 by betsylerner

A couple of months ago, a writer queried me with his work. I invited him to send it. Six weeks later, he politely asked if I had had a chance to read it. I had no recollection of his letter or receiving the material. I apologized and asked him to send it again, promising to get back to him in a week.

This morning I read his pages, first read of the day which is always my best and freshest. I was immediately taken with his precise prose. A superb adjective and simile in the first two pages knocked me out. Then some aspects didn’t sit well with me, then I grew restless with the story, even though I recognized his abundant skill.

I wrote him a rejection letter. I was apologetic and gave some notes about the work. Usually, I’m much more general. I knew that no matter what I said, it would ring hollow.

He wrote me back, thanking me for my time, polite again. He referenced Roger Angell’s rejection letters to Richard Yates. I looked them up and they are rich. He allowed that he believed in his work and that if the prose is fine, the rest should follow: plot, characters, setting. etc. It wasn’t like the usual letter I receive after I decline a work. It was poised and sincere and pained but not at all indulgent. And I have been haunted by it all day.

*Richard Yates

Filed under: Rejection | 12 Comments »

The A List

Posted on July 9, 2009 by betsylerner

Got one for the Asshole File today, a real doozy. I wish I could reprint the letter here, but that would be CAREER SUICIDE. I’ve heard from some readers that they’re starting their own A-hole Files, inspired by an earlier post on this very blog. Do you people have any idea how happy you make me?

Filed under: Editor, Protocol | 4 Comments »

Say It With Flowers

Posted on July 8, 2009 by betsylerner

This just in from a reader:

Hi Betsy,
My agent just sold my first book. I’m trying to act like a grown-up, but really, I feel like peeing my pants. Question: is there something special I should do to show my appreciation (besides, of course, forking over the commission?)
Thanks, K

Dear K: Congratulations to you and your agent. I know my readers would love to know what the book is, how many publishers were vying for it, how many millions the publisher is giving you as an advance. But we’re too polite to ask.

How do you thank an agent? Say it with flowers. Scotch if your agent is a dude.

One more thing: remember this feeling. You will never love your agent more than in this moment, or feel the earth a more benevolent place than now. This will eventually fade and be replaced with resentment (“forking over the commission”), disappointment, neglect and despair.

Love, Betsy

Filed under: Agent, Publishing | 5 Comments »

People Tell Me It’s a Sin to Know and Feel Too Much Within

Posted on July 7, 2009 by betsylerner

For the record, I actually had a superb day. Pitched a new project this morning and felt…hopeful. Later, some excellent dish at my agents’ lunch. Apparently, on a publishing panel at a writer’s conference, an agent, who unfortunately has to go unnamed, got up FOUR times during the panel because he was in the middle of an auction and his Blackberry was vibrating more than a Magic Fingers in the Tenderloin.I hope I can pull off a stunt like that when I’m on the agents’ panel at Tin House next week. That’s more than agenting — it’s performance art. We were going to talk about the Endeavor/William Morris merger, but we forgot to. Yawn.

Later that same day, I ran into my client on the street, coming from an interview with Leonard Lopate. He’s from Vermont and I rarely get to see him. I bought him a sandwich and we commiserated on the state of publishing. This guy won THREE major literary prizes last year and still no review from the NYT. What’s up with that?

And, finally, went to a kick ass party for the launch of Josh Lyon’s first book, PILLHEAD. My colleague, his agent, Erin Hosier hosted the bash and it was filled with people who all looked fantastic. They even had a special drink called “The Pillhead” made with Absolut Pear, lime, maybe a little Fresca and I think a few oxy’s thrown in for the hell of it.

Then, as providence would have it, walking back to the office through Washington Square Park under a darkening sky, my shuffle delivered up Simple Twist of Fate.

Filed under: Agent, Books, Client | 1 Comment »

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