It’s seven weeks into the new year, do you know where your writing project is? Hitting it, fits and starts, stalled out? I’m deep in and it’s all I want to do but I will confess that every other day I think it sucks, that I’m deluding myself, that I was never meant to write fiction, imposter syndrome run wild. But then every other day, I’m in the saddle, writing until my hands cramp. I’m in the whiplash stage, but I’m determined to push through. I also understand that the project might wind up in the drawer but I have to finish the fucker. I don’t believe in closure, but I love completion.
If you’re still hanging out at The Lerner Home for Wayward Children, let me know what you’re working on and how it’s going. Or if you need a kick in the ass.
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Betsy Lerner 
Hey there. It’s been a while. I’m shopping around a poetry manuscript called Words with Friends. It’s finished until/unless I write another poem that goes in it, which I keep doing.
I ask my Facebook friends for a single word each, and then I use each word, one per line, in a poem that, despite the words being completely disconnected from each other, gels.
Fiction is just nonfiction with different names. I’m sure it’s already great.
Oh, fuck. I didn’t log in. It’s the cake lady.
I realized recently that I didn’t really understand what editing is. I fixed stuff, I changed some wording, but I haven’t truly edited my two MG coming-of-age novels, I only dabbed at them. So, this year I’m going to tackle what I believe will be a true edit of both. Also I’m working on a submission to Writer’s Digest (contest), and some poetry (also for a competition). And Betsy, we are all very proud of you. Just keep plugging away at it and I know you’ll publish a fabulous work of fiction. I’ve truly enjoyed your blog over the years. I love how you often say “Fuck.” One of your biggest fans, Jude
I really hope this doesn’t post twice – had some technical glitches. All to say, I love hearing your news.
I just had a weird experience with a short-short story I was sure was 95% done. I ended up tweaking it for hours and hours over the course of a few months. As in: it more or less ruined a rare writing weekend and another writing day a few months after. But a few weeks ago, I got to the proper end. A writer buddy made a suggestion or two, and it was done. I decided to submit it to my first-choice pub because they’re so courteous and quick with their rejections. This time, it was a yes.
Yippee and all that, but the question I’ve been wrestling with is this: Are these wee victories worth all the pain and time arguably wasted, or should this never ever, ever happen again?
Anyway, I’m now onto something else and am hell-bent on being more productive and less precious. Any and all kicks in the ass are welcome. Greetings from Switzerland.
Have posted as “Dorli” many a time but technical glitches etc.
take a victory lap and get back to work!!
Beautiful advice. Thank you to whoever wrote it 🙂
Haven’t written (for publication) since I retired my column which was months ago. Do I miss it? I DO NOT miss the deadline. I do miss reader feedback though. Having said that I recently started a piece (yesterday) for HuffPost. Essays are my thing.
Nice to know you are still hardballing it Betsy.
Haven’t written since I retired my column months ago. Do I miss it? I DO NOT MISS THE DEADLINE. I do miss reader feedback though. Just started a piece (yesterday) for HuffPost. As you know essays are my thing.
Nice to see you’re still hardballing it Betsy.
This is my second try posting this. Word ate the first one when I signed in.
Carolynnwith2Ns
Ha ha !! I knew this would happen. Good day to all.
Hullo, all. It’s been an age, during which Betsy has been something to brag about, which I do too much.
I’m writing a memoir I don’t want to write. Apparently, though, I’m MEANT to.
It’s called MAKE ME A (F**KING) MIRACLE. Yeah, it’s about miracles, of all things. I have no idea how this has happened.
I don’t know why I’m listed as “Anonymous” in my comment about writing a memoir …. I am most definitely NOT anonymous. My name is Josephine Carr.
A kick in the ass is what I need. Having a rough time getting motivated these days and motivation is what’s needed. I’ve kind of hit a wall, like there’s not enough I can do, so what’s the point. Maybe I just need to write for the sake of writing and forget about making a statement? Nah, fuck that. Might as well have some fun even if I wind up going down in flames.
And yes, I’m still here and happy you are, too.
Keep the faith.
-MikeD
ass officially kicked! Good to see you!
Thanks for talking about the whiplash stage. It meant so much twenty years ago when I first read about that feeling in this interview in Shambhala:
The pursuit of poetry or, for lack of a better term, a worthy piece of work, is like being on a crusade, on a mission. When I feel in my heart that I’ve attained it, it almost feels like I’ve been knighted by God, anointed in some way. This is, of course, followed by complete self-doubt.
– Patti Smith
Thanks for talking about the whiplash stage. It meant so much twenty years ago when I first read about that feeling in this interview in Shambhala:
The pursuit of poetry or, for lack of a better term, a worthy piece of work, is like being on a crusade, on a mission. When I feel in my heart that I’ve attained it, it almost feels like I’ve been knighted by God, anointed in some way. This is, of course, followed by complete self-doubt.
– Patti Smith
amazing!
Not really writing just now. Not procrastinating either, just prioritising other things. Curious to know Betsy what about Shred Sisters was different for you in terms of sticking with fiction and digging in. What had changed in your external or internal life to make it driving? Or is there no simple answer ?
no simple answer. I’m still scatching my head that it happened at all. this late life surprise has completely invigorated me. I suspect it’s been there all along just finally able to access..??
I had so much fun following your journey as you promoted SHRED SISTERS – the book was an awesome read! It kept me up well past my bedtime. Kudos!
I’m working on the next project – which has some direction, but mostly I’m just going along, seeing where it heads. For the first time in a while, I’m not writing under contract – and there’s this feeling of less pressure, “just go with the flow” and it’s really helpful! (who knew???)
yes, working without a contract is like flying without a net. I’m with you!
I soldier on. The landscape has changed. I’ve pivoted largely to my Substack now. Come see: https://tetmancallis.substack.com/
Very curious about how you’re finding the Substack experience. Please report back! Glad you’re still in the field no matter the landscape. Soldier on!
Substack is fairly easy to use. It took me a couple of weeks to master the basics. The back end is robust and you don’t need to know coding. If you can handle a WordPress blog, you can work with Substack.
The community is good. It doesn’t cost any money. If people want to sign up for paid subscriptions, they can do that. Many Substackers have various subscription levels where, the more you pay, the more you get. On my Substack, you have to pay if you want to leave comments; otherwise, there’s no charge at the Callis Palace.
I didn’t want to deal with the literary marketplace anymore. I’m aging out of that rat-race. Most editors and agents now are young enough to be my children or even my grandchildren. I am from a different world. Plus, I no longer wanted to fritter away my meager means of time and money on Submittable and countless “rejections with love.” It gets old. So do I. I still send a few things out, but I’ve largely shuttered that part of my operation.
I didn’t make all my work for it to be the lonely hill I died on. Nobody but bots and trolls came any longer to my WordPress blog. About six months ago I realized Substack was the route I should take if I was to have any sort of audience at all.
Thanks for the run down. Folks, let’s check out Tetman’s Substack!
What I’m doing right now exactly! Sucks, keep going, aha, over and over. Will I sub, yes, no, maybe…keep going. Thank you for this today, Betsy!
Phyllis
I hope you do finish the fucker, and that it doesn’t end up in a drawer, because I’m greedy that way, I want to read it.
Also, I need a kick in the ass. As far as the novel is concerned, I finished the fucker, edited, sent to a few beta readers, re-edited, and … so frustrated over the damn query process I could scream. I’ve been told I write a damn good story; I’ve also been told I can’t describe boiling water succinctly 🙂 so there’s that. I’m not giving up, but my frustration is getting the better of me at the moment, which means I’m doing absolutely nothing. UGH
And then there’s the memoir about the aftereffects of my grandson’s murder and my daughter’s prison sentence for her role in the tragedy, titled – Unconditional Love: When you’ve been Called to Practice what you Preach – It is just so gut wrenching to write, but I truly believe it has to be written. Even if, as you say, it sits in a drawer as a testament to completion. This is truly where I get the imposter syndrome. Maybe this story is only important to me, and I’m being grandiose in thinking it may be important in someone else’s life… acck.. anyway, kick in the ass x2 please!
Be well, and thank you for these spurts of encouragement, you’re an inspiration.
The memoir is not the subject matter someone would read every day, but it could immensely help the right people at the right time. If it sees the light of day, I’ll promise you this: I’ll buy it, I’ll read it, and if I can, I’ll write a glowing review of it. And if I can’t, I won’t write any review at all. Life’s too short to be mean-spirited. If I can’t give it five stars, I won’t give it anything at all, but I suspect that it would be worthy of five stars.
I can’t imagine what it will take out of you to write it. Only you can pay that price, so I can only wish you courage and Godspeed.
john…
Betsy, I loved Shred Sisters, so I’m glad you are writing like mad. Any hint as to what it’s about?
I’ve been doing a lot of editing for the last month, partly because I broke something in both of my shoulders and typing is one of the few things I can still do! Forced focus, but it’s been great to force those final, fine edits on my novel, Imprint and Inheritance.
Hi, Betsy. I’ve been working on a memoir for twenty years but finally got the courage to go head-on after my parents died and my sister ghosted me. I was doing great until life got in the way-bullshit-I didn’t make time in between. I plan to finish it by the end of this year and then seek editors and publishing houses.
After seeing Sheryl Sandberg Screams Before Silence on You Tube, I pushed my rollator as fast as it would to my desk and started a play. My writing group censored the 1st 25 pages, so full steam ahead! Dramatist Guild is consulting legal dept. I must be onto something!!!!
John C. Krieg
26 comments, and the day isn’t even half over. We have obviously missed you.
Personally, I have had many doubts since pulling a book I very much wanted out in the world from an academic publisher who I felt was whipping me too hard. I saw above that you feel that working without a contract is perilous, but I’m here to say that any contract that’s signed before the manuscript is approved is a ticking timebomb. The author has no leverage in that case, and certain editors can run amok. Don’t get me wrong, I feel that I need editing, but must admit that when it gets to the point where I’m asking, “Who’s writing this book? You or me?” – that something has gone seriously off the rails. Lest you think that I’m editor bashing, I’ll attach my homage to you that I included in a past essay entitled Snippets to Writers Much Better Than I:
Betsy Lerner: My God, did I ever enjoy your description of the cowboy poets that you observed while in college, but I couldn’t help but feel that as a straight-laced Yankee girl that perhaps you might have fantasized about a tryst with one of these bad boys. Would you have accepted a date with one (or more) of them, maybe? Anyway, The Forest for the Trees: An Editor’s Advice to Writers (2000) knocked my socks off. I could see elements of all the psyches of writer’s personalities that you so eloquently described in myself, especially the neurotic.
I only mention this because of a point that I want to make about what keeps me writing which is that it is the most democratic profession that there is, and if I can’t make it here, I probably can’t make it anywhere else. To write that essay, I went to my current book collection (I had given a few others away) at that time and haphazardly selected 22 books (out of 250) that caught my eye. After I got the essay published in a nondescript online zine the editor pointed out that he liked that I selected 11 women and 11 men. I had no idea at the time I selected the books, but I feel it illustrates that if the writing is great enough it really doesn’t matter who wrote it – it speaks for itself and will find a path to see the light of day.
A writer writes and sometimes it’s a heavy cross to bear. I don’t so much need a kick in the ass, as a kick in the head to get the juices flowing again.
Please come back sooner next time. Like I said, you have been sorely missed.
Thanks for this. I love the thought: if the writing is great enough it really doesn’t matter who wrote it. Of course my career is getting people paid for writing, but let’s not let that get in the way. Let’s live for great writing, our crosses, our chains, our wings.
And our validation when we know we are in the zone, if even for brief fleeting moments. That makes it all worth it.
Jax Lowell here — I’ve missed your dispatches from the trenches. A chapter of my project was in my Baggu bag (I like to take my work to neutral territory for editing.), when I lost consciousness on the street, ended up with a smashed shoulder, concussion, three brain bleeds, a face like a stitched baseball, and was carted off to a trauma unit for two weeks. Why I dropped is still a matter under investigation. At some point in the hospital, I found the bloodied pages and liked them. Granted I was high on Oxy and practicing the Fentanyl Fold. I am home now, and healing. I still like them. More than like them. I typed the chapter into the manuscript with one hand. I am grateful for my life, and do not question what I will do, albeit with less drama, with the extra innings.
Wow, was this timely for me to see. I just turned 65. I’m an audiobook narrator and have written 7 novels for (mostly) young adults. But my 8th book is STALLED and I’m suffering from a HUGE bout of Imposter’s Syndrome. (No one reads contemporary, realistic fiction! Especially yours! You need to write Vampire Porn…blah, blah, blah…) ANyway, I just listened to your interview on The Writer Files and you have inspired me so much, and I ran straight to Audible to buy Shred Sisters.
Anyway, your words were very motivating, and I feel my pity party coming to a close. Thank you!
Wow, was this timely for me to see. I just turned 65. I’m an audiobook narrator and have written 7 novels for (mostly) young adults. But my 8th book is STALLED and I’m suffering from a HUGE bout of Imposter’s Syndrome. (No one reads contemporary, realistic fiction! Especially yours! You need to write Vampire Porn…blah, blah, blah…) ANyway, I just listened to your interview on The Writer Files and you have inspired me so much, and I ran straight to Audible to buy Shred Sisters.
Anyway, your words were very motivating, and I feel my pity party coming to a close. Thank you!