• Bridge Ladies

    Bridge Ladies When I set out to learn about my mother's bridge club, the Jewish octogenarians behind the matching outfits and accessories, I never expected to fall in love with them. This is the story of the ladies, their game, their gen, and the ragged path that led me back to my mother.
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Another horrid day. I need to move forward but I’m so goddamn compulsive.I must pay the rent. You can’t pay the rent. Why do we put ourselves through this. What and leave show business? Rashes keep springing up on my body. I spent the day painting myself into a corner. I took a long walk in the middle of the day, tried to reset. Came home, tinkered to no avail and succumbed to answering email, soothing distracting endless email. Watched a half an episode of the Crown and ate whole wheat spaghetti. The crux of it is that I want readers to believe that a fucked up character is lovable, that people are highly inconsistent, and that love is a fraud.

Am I the only insomniac around here?

16 Responses

  1. You’re not alone

  2. this was my day exactly except for I ate a leftover pile of whatnot.

  3. you’re not the only insomniac. But you are alone. Fucked up characters know that, but they don’t believe it.

  4. Trust yourself. You know what works and what doesn’t.

    Insomnia plus a joint = mind racing. too many thoughts at once, hard to get it all on paper and next thing you know it’s morning and all you want to do is sleep.

  5. You are not. It’s 4:16 am and I’ve been awake since midnight, and will now have to spend the day asking people if I can help them.

  6. Not alone. I was awake at 2AM after dreaming that Mikaela Shiffrin gifted me her gold medal skis after winning a race in France. How f’ked is that?! I didn’t go back to sleep because the dream was so good.

  7. Insomnia the new sleep. And favorite fucked up character? Ignatius J. Reilly.

  8. “Am I the only insomniac around here?”

    Apparently not, but I am no longer among that beleaguered league’s ranks. Usetabee, usetabee, fer shure, then life came along and kicked me in the ass. Now I turn in for a good night’s rest, and generally get it, or that which will suffice.

    I knew a writer up NYC way who viewed insomnia as a gift. We were so much younger then. But as we who are bedeviled by creativity’s daemonic impulses know, when you can’t sleep, what better than to get back to work amirite? Would that I still could put in the insanely long and sleepless hours, but therein lies madness. Or doctor’s bills, another form of madness.

    I do go on. Get some rest. A handful of cashews about a half-hour before bedtime can help. Don’t forget to floss.

  9. I just read the rules: No caffeine and that means chocolate too, after 10 a.m. No screens: tv, phone, computer, etc., an hour before going to bed. I’m trying so I can get up only once, at 7 a.m. Not easy but so far, 3 days, seems to be helping. If that doesn’t work, read Proust or Henry James. 3 pages should do it. Sweet dreams.

  10. WTF is sleep anyway? I was up my dear and swore I would not check my phone. Now I wish I had.
    I’m off to zzzzzzzz which means I’ll be up later.

  11. I actually sleep like well. (I hear boos and hissing) Without any sleep aids. (more boos and hissing) I was on a melatonin kick and one night decided not to take it b/c I WAS having trouble sleeping. That was two months ago, and so far, kicking that habit was a good thing.

    If it’s any consolation when it comes to work, I am still struggling to find a new title. Two weeks in.

  12. I’m not an insomniac per se, I only have trouble sleeping at night when I nap too much.

    What jumps out at me is the whole wheat spaghetti. If you want to sleep well, try regular spaghetti. A little olive oil, some sliced garlic, fresh basil, grape tomatoes, a couple pieces of crusty bread. A nice salad. That’s a meal that’ll put you to sleep!

    I believe that a fucked up character can be lovable and I know that people can be highly inconsistent. But love is only a fraud when it’s not really love.

    Get a good night’s sleep. You can worry about the rent tomorrow…

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