• Bridge Ladies

    Bridge Ladies Sometimes I think a meteor could strike the earth and wipe out mankind with the exception of my mother’s Bridge club — Roz, Bea, Bette, Rhoda, and Jackie — five Jewish octogenarians who continue to gather for lunch and Bridge on Mondays as they have for over fifty years. When I set out to learn about the women behind the matching outfits and accessories, I never expected to fall in love with them. This is the story of the ladies, their game, and most of all the ragged path that led me back to my mother.
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Sooner or Later It All Gets Real**

Just in case you missed it, Martin Short has signed with HarperCollins to write his memoir. The comic shared the following: “Although I’ve never read a book all the way through, I’m sure excited to write one.  Mr. Short added: “I haven’t named my book yet, but I’m toying with the title ‘If I’d Saved, I Wouldn’t Be Writing This.’ ”

Can anyone top that?

**Neil Young lyrics in honor of fellow countryman Mr. Short.

25 Responses

  1. A prospective editing client told me it would just take a month or so to *bang out* a novel as good as The Kite Runner. That was 6 months ago…total output since: 12 meh pages.

  2. A lovely friend of mine, whose small press book has won all the regional awards and who has thousands of adoring fans, was told by the agent who took her on (supposedly on the basis of her literary merit) to write a thriller using the theme for which she’s known as window dressing.

  3. i always wanted to borrow from a Mac Davis song for my memoir title: “Lord, It’s Hard to Be Humble.”

  4. I must say, only Pat Sajak can top Mr. Short.

    • I suspect Martin Short would love being topped by Pat Sajak and that Pat wouldn’t be the only one.

  5. I wouldn’t be surprised if that title stuck, nothing like truth right on the cover.

  6. “Everything is Not Enough”
    – Stolen from the song “To Live Is to Fly” by Townes Van Zandt.

  7. I got cream cheese on my mouse.
    Oh sorry, that’s not a suggestion, really I just got cream cheese on my mouse.

  8. “Hey You, I Know You, I Know You.” Or maybe, “I’m Not That Strong A Swimmer.”

    Brilliant Reference: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A2AU2xu3CeQ

  9. “Who Am I and What Am I Doing?”

  10. Computer Cowboy

  11. “Lose Weight By the Paragraph: A True Story of the The White House, Vampires, and Murder, as told by the dog.”

  12. “Don’t Bug Me,” by Jayne Doe Anonymous

  13. Faildozer: The Art of Sleeping in Cars

  14. But I Had the Coolest Bike?

  15. I’m fixated on his string of words “all the way through” as a better title. Perhaps the subtitle could be “The Long Tale of Martin Short”.


  16. “If you were smart you wouldn’t be reading this”

  17. I Deserve a MacArthur More Than Someone Who Plays A Flute.

    True story. A flutist won it last year. And here I am, awake at 3:40 in the morning in Marrakech on a research trip for my book and I can’t sleep because I really hate being in Marrakech. I bet if I played the flute I’d be tucked up in my own bed getting my beauty rest but noooooooo, I have to be a WRITER and take notes in shit holes like Marrakech. And I haven’t even suffered through the first draft yet. I never thought I’d say this but I wish I’d learned to play the flute.

  18. Sort of related. Go to 4:22 if you must.

    I’m straight (so far) but Patti makes me as weak at the knees as Neil (and that is damn weak even though his autobiography kinda soured me)

  19. Or maybe Martin could call it, “Everybody Knows This is Nowhere.”

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